I struggle with labels.
Division happens when we try to label someone as a thing. A Liberal, a fascist, a leftist, a right winger, a Christian, a muslim, a victim of (insert a label), a bigot, a student, a mother, an entrepreneur. The list is practically endless because in todays time, people have created a need to associate with a group. As soon as we gain an iota of knowledge on someone we are quick to throw a label on them. Often, the label is far fetched, and doesn't grant one a fill picture of a person. These are assumptions at best. It's like a grown up version of name calling at times and causes nothing but division.
I see so many people around me identify with a group, or groups, heck even with certain religious denominations but it doesn't quite carve out their character because of a label or association. People hide behind a label, and we know that some labels are untouchable. Have a different label than your neighbour? Well, buckle up baby because you can't associate with certain labels now either. This has gotten out of hand. When did we diminish people to a title? When did we stop seeing people and start trying to contain who they are without ever having a long enough conversation to determine their character?
We do this to ourselves too (and I am guilty of it). I'm an artist, a knitter, a sister, a bunny and dog mom, a best friend, a Christian, a girlfriend. So many labels but none of this is who I am and none of this describes my character unless you assume traits about my labels. Now, this is where it gets dangerous friends. When we assume character based off of what we believe to be true about a person with a certain label, we carry a bias that makes it extremely difficult to learn about the person. How often I've avoided someone because they behaved, or associated with a certain label is almost shameful to admit. How often I've seen entire identities shift because of one label. How often personas are built around one label, and here is where it can get scary, here is where judgement lays with one eye open. Worse, some people hide behind a label to justify their actions, even if their actions are discriminatory, dehumanizing and wrong.
This past year, I've been treading through what feels like an ocean of water unlearning judgement. I've been unlearning assumptions and paying close attention to who people are. Behind every label is a person aching to be known. Why is it such a struggle to just talk to someone to know them before slapping a label on? I've been increasing the amount of time I spend with strangers and being a tattoo artist helps with that immensely. Being new to a Christian church has also been helpful in speaking with complete strangers. I've come to realize that all sorts of people actually long for the same thing--we just go about it in different ways. At the root of labels is a need to belong, a need to feel connected with a community. I can write an entire book about this need and how the labels of today link directly to the need to feel connected to others. I'll spare the novel here but what I will elaborate on is the fact that people are so focused on identifying with existing labels, or creating new ones, that they've forgotten about what makes us all the same.
People have started wars over labels. I even see it today in Guelph with the elections coming up. People arguing over what councillor associates with what political party (even though they are independent) and jumping down each others throats in the comments section, immediately labeling others. It makes my head spin thinking about how we, as people, became so desensitized while completely missing the root problem. Where did the love all go? Nothing good ever came from trying to contain someone into a box of identity. We've forgotten to look deeper, have the hard conversations and do so without labeling someone. We've forgotten how to disagree and still co-exist.
Mates, this is getting ludicrous! I am in the belief that the banter needs to go away and the focus needs to return to the basics- treat people with kindness and compassion and leave the labelling. There is a hard truth in here though, and it's that compassion is also telling the truth to someone, even if you know it may hurt their feelings. This includes stripping the labels away and looking at peoples true character. Kindness and compassion still means that you can disagree with someone and co-exist. How you feel does not override the facts (and truth) but it's important to note that we are all held responsible to tell the truth. My wish is that one day, we can all feel comfortable enough with who we are individually and seek out the individual in others--to seek out the light in others.
I'm dreading the election season as many wild behaviours come out of people. My goal in this season is to look deeper into the people creating the worst havoc and try to figure out what is the middle ground that we all align on. After all, we all sound like we want the same things! Maybe this rant will encourage someone to look past someones label and dig deeper into who they are, what do they need and how to co-exist with them. Maybe this will be the start of someone developing themselves rather than defining or diminishing themselves with a label. Heck, maybe reading this might inspire someone to learn about their own perceptions of themselves, maybe question their actions more.
I think I'm ready for bed now, the brain has been emptied. Until next time!
0 comments